Flirting on social media - What are men getting wrong? |GirlsOfCherryDTV

Flirting on social media – What are men getting wrong?

Are you flirting on social media in the right ways?

Chances are, if you’re single and on social media, you’re probably using it as a way to meet your new squeeze.
Let’s be real, it’s the perfect platform these days to connect with people days. People that you may not normally be able to meet in real life.

Think of social media as the gateway to your future dream date or relationship.

The crux of flirting is such a secretive thing. It’s really pretty simple though.
If you are the “flirter” you just give someone special a little extra of your attention. I say a little extra on purpose.
The last thing you want to do in any situation (online or in person) is to make someone feel weird or awkward.

So, how do you flirt without coming across as “too much”?

Well, you need to learn to read a social situation. At times this is unfortunately something a lot of men are really bad at doing. It’s not on purpose.
It’s just that, when some men are confronted with a beautiful human being they can forget their own names.
(Do you feel me?)

This is true on social media too. Lots of genuine guys totally mess up on social media flirting, which is a real kick in the pants (literally). Like I said, if you know what you’re doing, it can be used as the gateway to your next potential mind blowing date or relationship.

Flirting on social media..

Let me break it down for you.

Just like in real life social situations where you are face to face with a girl..
Guys can sometimes strike out on social media because they’re oblivious to paying attention to behavioural cues.

They get all worked up and hot under the collar and do the online equivalent of strolling up to a woman and saying something like…
“hey, wow, you’re really hot, do you wanna come home and see my weights, maybe we can “netflix and chill”?
There isn’t much form of subtlety or conversation…
this can have a girl pretty much thinking that they’re just after one thing.
You may as well have a fluro light flashing above your head reading – Douchebag!

How To Ask For What You Need In A Relationship

Here are a few Do’s and Don’ts to help you out

Do’s
1. Comment with something simple and genuine.
2. Call her by her name.
3. If you need to use another name, use it in context rather than directly.
For example, “Hey Kristy that’s a really cute photo”
or “Hey Kristy that looks like a beautiful place, where is this taken?”. Even a one word compliment on a new random photo she has is fine. It shows you’re paying attention without being overt.
4. Create conversation in the comments before you slide into her DMs.
5. Like a couple of her recent photos or comment on them. She will get notifications which will show her that you’re looking at her profile, not a photo she’s just posted.
Don’t scroll through and like a post from 6months ago or a year, that will be wierd.
6. Be subtle with your attention, create a relationship in the comments.

Don’ts
1. Don’t use lame ass GIFs like a wolf whistling or a drooling face
2. Don’t leave derogatory comments like “nice rack”
3. Don’t call her nicknames like sugar tits or hottie (argh, yuck)
4. Do NOT slide straight into her DMs with a “holy shit you’re fucking hot!”
(she’d probably be a millionaire by now if she added up the amount of these tacky messages she’s had)
You need to do better than that to stand out.
5. Don’t like every single photo (creepy!)

Things to Remember when flirting on social media

If you start paying her a little extra attention, chances are she will go to your profile and have a look.

So be mindful of what you are posting!

If she sees a bunch of shared images of half naked girls or a lot of different girls in general…
Then she could probably go straight to “is this guy is a player”.
If she sees post after post of you on messy nights and benders looking like a tool..
haha chances are she’s probably going to think – immature and not ready to date.

So, be mindful of what you post and share. If you wouldn’t want it on the front of a newspaper, don’t post it.
Likewise for when you are talking to people in your comments.
Think about it like this, if your sister or someone you really care about was being spoken to that way, would you be ok with it?
Or, does it just sound like another douchey guy looking to get his handle stroked?

So you’ve liked a few of her photos and left a couple of comments and now she’s started to like a couple of your’s.

If you’re lucky, comment on one or two.
Now is a good time to shoot her a message. Just say “hey”, because she’s engaged you by sharing some interest back (stay with me here).
Don’t immediately send her a message saying “man, you’re so hot” or something equally straightforward.
Play it cool and don’t be desperate.
Also elaborate on the hey, drive a conversation and a response.

“Don’t be desperate” is kind of the fundamental guiding principle here.

Just realise that by messaging her in private, you’ve taken it to the next level.

What if she doesn’t respond? I’ll be straight up, it means she’s not interested, or perhaps not comfortable with flirting online, some people aren’t! Carry on, as in, move on. Leave it there.

News flash – women notice signals.

Any woman with some sort of attractiveness is getting attention on social media. They know what that looks like and they get the idea that by you liking some of their stuff, that you’re interested.
So, if you flirt, and they don’t flirt back, it’s pretty safe to assume that you’re being shut down (sorry).
Take a subtle hint and go flirt with somebody else, don’t take it personally and give yourself some credit for trying.
The last thing you want to do is to come across as desperate or overly persistent.
You especially don’t want to make a woman feel harassed or uncomfortable, however good your intentions are.

While we’re talking about what women notice..
There’s another super important downfall of social media flirtation that you need to avoid.
When you’re flirting with someone, you shouldn’t reveal that you’ve looked at every single picture of them.
Don’t play dumb with me, you do this, or no doubt have done it at some point.

When you’re really into someone you’ve seen or met online..

Whether it be on Facebook/ Instagram or a dating site..
you 100% go back through to see all her history!
You’re human, it’s an unavoidable temptation.
Technology gives us the option to take in the entirety of someone’s life in half an hour.

Freaky hey?

But… you shouldn’t feel guilty or creepy about it, everyone does it!
It’s exciting and fun to get to know someone you fancy through what they post. You start to create an awesome imaginary picture in your head of what you could do together (happily ever after!)

But, and a big but here guys

If you let somebody know that you’ve been checking out every single post of theirs.. (even if they might be keen on you). This can make somebody feel a bit uncomfortable. They possibly will be creeped out, some things are just best left to discover as you get to know one another.

So in closing, and just to reiterate

If you take anything away from this it is to not look desperate. Don’t over love on someone, even if it’s legit because you just love all the photos!
When in doubt, just hit the like button a few times and chill. ?

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